As Long As Youre Happy

This is the only way I know how to convince myself and to console myself from the storm building up inside of me, it’s a mere attempt to console myself and put a rest to the battle I fight each day with myself. Its been a total of nine months and only I know how I have survived through all these times, dying each day, I know it was my decision to blow out the fire that was already weak and dying but all this while I knew one thing and one thing only that as long as you were happy nothing else in the world matters. Its only because of your happiness that I haven’t uttered a single word in all these months because I wanted to gift you the only thing that I could, the only thing that was within my grasp which was happiness. I gave you all the happiness I could at the expense of my wish and likes.

 
I see you smiling, laughing and having the time of your life and then I realize that maybe I wasn’t wrong in doing what I did, this is exactly what I wanted for you, to live life to your fullest and enjoy every moment of it knowing that someone is happy only because of your happiness. I was confused and dishearted about this huge void in my life that reminds me of your absence each day but knowing that you are doing much better without me gives me a sigh of relief and it’s just the way life should be for you and as for me Ill live with the memories of the 12 months that are more precious to me than the rest of my life. Each night, the sparkle of the stars reminds me of the shine I used to see in your eyes when you used to be gleaming with joy.. I miss seeing that but ill live as long as you are happy I have no regrets